Subtle Indications of Emotional Struggles in Motherhood, Not Always Visible as Sadness
Breaking the Silence: Mental Health Struggles in Mothers
Navigating pregnancy, postpartum, and child rearing can take a toll on a mother's mental health. However, due to social norms and misconceptions, many of the symptoms that surface often go unnoticed or undervalued.
Agustina Wainsztein, a Perinatal Psychiatry specialist, warns that mothers might undergo deep emotional distress, silent and secluded, due to our collective belief that it's an inevitable part of motherhood.
Complex Symptoms: Beyond Depression and Sadness
The signs of weak mental health may not always manifest as depression or crying spells. In fact, the symptoms could include persistent irritability, extreme fatigue that persists despite rest, disrupted sleep patterns, and an unhealthy obsession with potential dangers to the child. Some mothers might even experience a disconnect with their baby, particularly during the postpartum phase, feeling detached from their new roles.
The longer these signals persist, Wainsztein states, the more essential it becomes to break the silence and seek help.
Variables Triggering Discomfort
The emotional toll on new and expectant mothers might begin during pregnancy, intensifying during postpartum, and can last for years. Factors contributing to this unease vary greatly: from hormonal fluctuations and personal history of mood disorders to social issues such as violence, unemployment, and couple problems.
In intense cases, mothers may feel overwhelmed by physical fatigue, an excessive load of responsibilities, and pressure to satisfy the needs of many roles. "Mental load is often invisible but constant," Wainsztein observed.
The Burden of Guilt
From a clinical and cultural perspective, guilt is a frequent emotion that new mothers grapple with. María Agustina Capurro, a psychologist with a perinatal and reproductive focus, emphasized this, stating that guilt is deeply ingrained within our society, often preventing mothers from expressing their limitations without feeling like they are inadequate or incompetent.
Mauricio Strugo, a psychologist and sexologist specializing in couples and postpartum research, added that guilt is the cost that many mothers pay when they don't conform to the role society expects of them. When they focus solely on fulfilling these expectations, rather than their own desires, they might find themselves resentful towards their partners or even their children over time.
When Symptoms Go Unchecked
Unfortunately, many obstacles obstruct the early detection of maternal mental health issues. In many cases, health professionals lack adequate knowledge about perinatal mental health, hindering proper diagnosis. Phrases like "You must be happy" or "You look well" can compel women to hide their true feelings, making it difficult for them to seek help.
Moreover, many women underestimate their symptoms, prioritize their families' wellbeing over their own, or believe that their only options are psychoactive medications. The stigma associated with postpartum mental health also proves a significant barrier.
The Support Network
Family and close friends can play a crucial role in the early detection of mental health issues in mothers. However, they must offer tangible support and appreciative listening, rather than dismissive phrases like "It'll pass."
Capurro noted that the expectation to "enjoy it, as it goes fast" can be detrimental to exhausted mothers, contributing to additional anxiety and dissatisfaction.
A Life Beyond Maternal Duties
When asked what is needed to support maternal mental health, specialists agreed that information, companionship, shared responsibilities, self-care spaces, and support networks are vital.
Strugo emphasized that mothers should never feel alone in raising their children; they should not sacrifice themselves in the process and should instead maintain connections with their previous identities beyond motherhood.
Capurro reinforced the idea, stating that childcare should be shared within couples, and that supportive networks would ultimately lead to a more sustainable family life.
"We can't keep talking about maternal mental health only once a year," Wainsztein concluded. "It must be a regular topic in the health, social, and cultural agenda, as silencing these conversations only exacerbates the problem."
Reference(s):
- Postpartum mental health.* (n.d.). In Healthline. Retrieved June 8, 2023, from https://www.healthline.com/health/postpartum-depression
- Perinatal depression: Its impact and prevention. (2020, April 14). In National Institute of Mental Health. Retrieved June 8, 2023, from https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/perinatal-depression/index.shtml
- Perinatal depression: Causes, symptoms, and treatment. (2022, January 12). In Mayo Clinic. Retrieved June 8, 2023, from https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/perinatal-depression/symptoms-causes/syc-20375490
- What are the most common mental health disorders in pregnant women and new mothers? (2021, October 4). In Verywell Family. Retrieved June 8, 2023, from https://www.verywellfamily.com/common-mental-health-disorders-in-pregnant-women-and-new-mothers-4188494
- Postpartum mental health disorders. (2020). In American Psychiatric Association. Retrieved June 8, 2023, from https://psychiatry.org/patients-families/postpartum-mental-health-disorders
- Maternal mental health. (2022). In American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG). Retrieved June 8, 2023, from https://www.acog.org/womens-health/faqs/maternal-mental-health
- Agustina Wainsztein suggests that maternal mental health symptoms can extend beyond common perceptions, including persistent irritability, extreme fatigue, disrupted sleep patterns, and an unhealthy obsession with potential dangers to the child.
- The emotional toll on mothers can be influenced by various factors, such as hormonal fluctuations, personal history of mood disorders, social issues, or physical fatigue and excessive responsibilities.
- Guilt is a frequent emotion among new mothers, often preventing them from expressing their limitations due to societal expectations and beliefs.
- The stigma associated with postpartum mental health can lead to obstacles in early detection, with some women prioritizing their families' wellbeing over their own or underestimating their symptoms.
- Family and close friends can play a crucial role in the early detection of mental health issues in mothers, offering tangible support and appreciative listening rather than dismissive phrases.
- Experts believe that information, companionship, shared responsibilities, self-care spaces, and support networks are essential for supporting maternal mental health and preventing the problem from being exacerbated.
